Writing on the Fly – SOL Day 11

So, at about 4ish today, before I took my nap, and then at about 8ish, after I took my nap (I’m Christianing my Spring Break, you see), I thought about how I still needed to write my Slice of Life for the day — and I felt a lump of dread form in my stomach, as though I swallowed a lump of raw dough whole.

Not the kind of thing I wanted to feel on this, my second year of completing the challenge.

I’d already noticed a lot of my little SOL friends from last year are missing, I lamented the fact that I hardly see them blogging, and, of course, I wondered what my fate might me.  Do I give up, too?

I just wasn’t feeling the fire.  It’s been creeping up on me this week, especially with Life.  And then Life.  And more Life.

I decided to go in for an adjustment.

I didn’t quite write about this yet, because it was against my self-imposed “rules” — I hadn’t written about it in my Notebook for the idea to make it to my blog — BUT — here, I’m going to tell you now what I should have said at the beginning of this paragraph:

My plan was to really use my Notebook as a launchpad for all of my entries this year.

The experiment didn’t fail, I just need to tweak it.  I think that’s a trait of good writers to notice what’s working for them — or not — and to allow themselves the freedom and flexibility to adjust as they see fit.  Do whatever you can to NOT kill the Writing Spirit. .. because everything else in Life tries to smush it enough, I think.  Don’t you do it yourself.  Don’t allow mission-kill to creep in.  Do whatever you can to feed the fire, sustain the muse, even if it means abandoning plans and slowly modifying habits.

So… here I am absolutely free-writing on my blog, as I did last year.

Issues I observed with blogging were:

  • I didn’t reread my stuff much
  • I didn’t revise
  • I waited last minute A LOT to post  (hitting the 11:59 was very common for me)
  • I rushed with ideas and just dumped
  • Whatever writerly habits I developed online didn’t seem to translate to what I wanted to accomplish in my Notebook or in my real life writing.

Greatest success I experienced was:  forcing myself to address my own mind during a time in the school year that would have demanded I abandoned myself, my mind, my writing.  A 30-day commitment is a big deal.

Those observations were what led me to use my Notebook as a bridge.. to extend the thoughtfulness and the time thinking and preparing for each post.  To be more involved and mindful.

I just don’t have the time.  Not as much as I would want.  I’m raising a family, we have kids attending 3 different schools (university, middle and primary) — we rise early for commutes into the city.  So, yeah.. it’s tough to find time to be thoughtful in the Notebook to bridge that thinking to here.

What’s my plan now?

To just do whatever I feel like doing.  If I want to spit on a page online (like this), then I will.  I will continue to be thoughtful about writing in my Notebook and bridging it to here, because that’s something I really, really want to do — I just need to be more intentional about carving out that time.  I really want to allow myself to be free and unafraid of writing on the computer (which is probably what allllll this is about.. isn’t it curious how we get the point at the end of the page?).  I will work on going back and rereading my stuff that I type online.  Or not.  I’m among friends and colleagues.  What have I to fear?  Being chucked in jail?  Death?  Bah.

It’s just little ole me being me.

Hopefully — and I’m sensing this, look at how much I wrote — I will write more online during this year’s challenge, post beyond the SOL postings.

I won’t know until I try.  🙂

 

 

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11 thoughts on “Writing on the Fly – SOL Day 11

  1. I love this post. It is very real and relevant to so many of us. It’s difficult for me to pull myself to the computer and focus on something other than work-focus on me, what little time I actually have. But it’s so rewarding and even though I missed the central time already this year by 30 minutes, and I find myself posting at 11:59 almost every night, these little moments and little keepsakes of writing are worth it.
    I’m with you on this journey and I’m glad you’re here. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, it’s been really tough. I guess .. well, it’s really forming the BIC (butt in chair) habit. I looove the idea of my little writing time being longer that what I’m giving it. Gotta find a way. Thank you so much for your sweet thoughts. 🙂

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  2. Sending you encouragement to keep slicing. I wish I had more time to develop my ideas in my notebook before posting on my blog but it’s busy raising kids and living.
    I’m trying to not put pressure on my slices to be perfect but rather to just record my life.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your life is mine. .. and that’s exactly it, we’re “living.” Sometimes I’m afraid of the thought of what would happen if I took that hour, hour and a half I wish for.. there would be less living of me in the house and within the family. Love the idea of recording life, I’m going to remember this. Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. So demanding, so true.. and I consider myself easy going, trying to maintain a balanced life. Heart goes out to super-teachers and super-moms who give 110%. Sometimes, it’s enough to keep my eyes open during the day. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I relate to this so much! I did the #blogaday challenge a few years ago during grad school on my teaching blog – and it was so tough! There were days when I would technically “cheat” and write some catch-up posts all at the same time. I made it more about getting 365 posts during the whole year, rather than blogging each day. NOW, I have started a new blog just about my life and I have already found myself missing whole weeks! I love writing and blogging and sharing my thoughts, but it can be tough when you are tired from work or whatever else is going on. There are lots of people in the same boat as you, so don’t feel alone!

    Also, I started the March challenge on the 8th – just simply forgot about it until a week in – (so already failed at 30 days really!)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your words, now I don’t feel so much alone. I’m so grateful for the response this post has gotten, especially yours. I have goals — just like you (you were so brave with the #blogaday during grad school!) — and you’ve reminded me there is no “perfect” way to find that writing time, to write. Just gotta keep our hearts in it and not give up!!! You haven’t failed.. you’re just getting right what works for you. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m glad it made a difference for you!! And thank you for saying I haven’t failed – I can still do 30 days, just finish out March and do an extra week for myself! It was also hard to post how you felt about the challenge so thank you for being strong with that 🙂

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  4. Here’s what I love most about this challenge: I never feel like I’m alone! You’re not the only one feeling this way! I’ve felt this too and hated that something that I was so looking forward to, at times, felt burdensome. This is not unlike what our most of our students feel about writing and I believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling like that! There are just some times where you need to “muck around” in the junk stuff to bring out the good stuff. You reflect upon the process and then tweak it to make it better. Still though, if this is the page you want to “spit on” I can’t imagine what your “real” writing must look/sound like! I thought this post was written with such clarity and brutal honesty and I loved it! Thanks so much for sharing!

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  5. while I am not experienced as you are, I have notice patterns in successful blogs that I might adopt in the future and some that I am using now.
    Success ideas: Themes for the day: Ten things Thursday, Poetry Friday, think about making a formula for what you write certain days.
    For me: I write a day ahead. I am on same day today, but hope to catch up tonight and have it sitting to be reread in the AM. I write my draft in google and move it to my wordpress. I also keep a scroll inspiration list in my blog folder, on a padlet, and in a notebook. I have quite a few “quick” ideas that are my safety net. I used one this morning, a Haiku idea from Mary Lee Hahn. I keep copies of favorite blogs in my reading list as well. I try to not compare myself to others and not think too much about anything but improving myself.

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